Emotional Freedom Technique – What IS it?
Emotional Freedom Technique (or EFT for short), in its simplest form, can be used as a self-help tool which you can use anytime and anywhere, to regulate your emotions. With an EFT Practitioner you can go to a much deeper level and clear past trauma and negative self-limiting beliefs. It’s a bit like acupuncture without the needles. Where acupuncture deals with physical pain, EFT also deals with psychological issues by focusing on situations that cause emotional distress, clearing blocked energy and bringing the body’s system back into a state of balance.
How does this help?
As a self-help tool it helps you to relieve stress and anxiety, increases motivation and confidence and can help with many other issues. As weird as it seems, combining tapping on specific points on the body, associated with the meridian energy systems, and at the same time talking about negative emotions, sends messages to the brain that you are “safe” and allows you to return to a state of balance. Weird it may be, but it really does work!
Your subconscious “buttons” may be pushed
Sometimes people may say something like “she was really pushing my buttons!” and it’s usually associated with a negative response such as anger.
Ever wondered WHY you respond in a certain way every time? Many times, these “patterns” have been laid down in childhood, often pre-seven years old, for many different reasons. So, a belief, made at the age of five may still be playing out subconsciously today. As adults, these active “buttons” may be pressed at any time by our family or others. We’re not consciously aware of them but when the “button” is pressed, we react automatically, and this might trigger all sorts of thoughts and feelings within us.
EFT helps to positively change how we feel
Through EFT we can bring our subconscious beliefs into our conscious mind where we’re able to gain understanding and perspective, find solutions and permanently clear those patterns held in our body on an energetic level. It’s like turning the connection to the “button” off.
How does this help me & my family?
As parents this instant “flicking of the switch” can cause problems in how we deal with situations with our kids and partners: we don’t really think about how we’re responding or why in that moment, we simply react.
EFT is a powerful way to help work through family issues that are causing problems. So many of our issues arise because of our beliefs. For example, we don’t feel in control, fear we’re going to fail, feel we’re not good enough, are people pleasers and then resent what we do, or have internal conflict, and sometimes this becomes external conflict too. Fundamentally, at a subconscious level, what we’re really trying to do is keep ourselves safe, our minds and bodies working together for survival.
Let me explain: if you feel unsafe, for whatever reason, your body responds at lightning speed, and you respond by going into fight, flight, or freeze. The logical part of your brain, where you can think clearly and find solutions, immediately shuts down. You’re now operating from a survival viewpoint against what you perceive as a threat. It doesn’t matter if a perceived threat is real or not and even our own thoughts can put us into “FFF”. In short, when we’re in this state we’re not thinking, only reacting.
EFT is simple, powerful, and effective. It’s brilliant for kids.
Teaching children EFT is giving them the tools to be able to self-regulate their own emotions, resulting in them being equipped with the means to help themselves through the ups and downs of life.
Learning and using EFT as a family means you all reap the benefits both individually and collectively. It can make a huge difference in relationships and in the way we feel about ourselves and our families and makes it easier to navigate the rich tapestry of life we all experience.
Samantha Bowley (DipHypPsych)
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From Sarah:
Samantha Bowley is one of our lovely Resident Experts inside The Connective Parenting Hub, and joins us every month to guide our members through an EFT and relaxation session aimed at parents and carers.
I’d highly encourage you to visit www.samanthabowley.com to find out more about EFT and how it can help!

Fancy joining one of Samantha’s sessions inside The Connective Parenting Hub?
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If this blog was helpful, you might be interested in:
The Connective Family Formula: the new five week group course from Sarah Fisher.